Talkin 'Bout My Gen-eration!

Who among us will ever forget the day that unwelcome "welcome to AARP" letter arrives in the mail? Talk about rubbing your face in it! At first, I just laughed it off and pretended it was some type of ridiculous mistake. All those pictures of white-haired, smiling couples knocking golf balls around their retirement communities. My hair's not white! (Thanks to Miss Clairol). I'm not ready to retire (if only) and even if I did, it certainly would not be so I could practice my swing with a bunch of alta cokkas! Not me - I'm no way near there, but when I am, you bet I'll be living it up my way. Zipping around the Italian countryside on my Vespa, writing my memoirs while flirting with the locals in Italian. Maybe my novel will become a huge best seller and I'll be busy trotting the globe on book tours with periodic stopovers at Yaddo to renew my spirit. Or maybe my passion for beauty and cosmetics will result in a new way for me and my aging peers to really prolong our youthful looks and vitality. I can think of a million scenarios - fantasy and fantastic - but none of them have anything to do with golf. No - not us! Talkin 'bout my gen-eration!